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For awhile now, I've been feeling drained and exhausted, about my writing and about parts of my life. My husband equates it to carrying around a giant backpack. I packed it many years ago with things I thought I needed to succeed, to survive - including loyalty to my dreams, stubbornness, defensiveness, anger. And those things did keep me going for awhile, and I'm thoroughly glad I had them.
But they've taken on a weight I can no longer carry, one I no longer want to carry, one I no longer need to carry.
I'm making changes. I'm working on my weight - losing actual physical pounds - and re-thinking my writing, searching for the zest and the gusto again.
I am putting down the backpack. I'm a little nervous, but I am moving forward - unencumbered, joyful, ready.
That's a great attitude. We definitely need determination but that can lead to pressure on ourselves that's counterproductive. Here's to travelling light!
ReplyDeleteIt took waaaay too long to get to this realization, but I'm happy I finally arrived at it. And I love the idea/phrase "traveling light." :)
DeleteIt's so much easier to jump for joy without the weight. I'm trying to join you on that one--simplifying life and getting healthy...er. I forget what a nightmare it is taking pounds off post-baby.
ReplyDelete"It's so much easier to jump for joy without the weight." - I am so going to remember that, Crystal!
DeleteAnd at least you have a good excuse for those extra pounds. :)
Drop the baggage! You'll feel so much better.
ReplyDeleteI hope so!
DeleteYes, put down that backpack! You're FREEEEEE!
ReplyDeleteWheeeee! :)
DeleteI just had my second baby so I'm joining you on this weight loss journey. And put the backpack down, burn it, and live free!
ReplyDeleteBabies are an awfully good reason for weight gain. Don't be too hard on yourself!
DeletePut down that backpack right now Madeleine and you will be free. I put down my backpack some time back :)
ReplyDeleteGood for you!
DeleteNow all I can picture is a parking lot somewhere full of dropped and abandoned packs, their owners running and leaping and dancing down various trails and paths.... :)
Good for you. But don't leave your security blanket behind. :-)
ReplyDeleteAnna from elements of emaginette
Never! :)
DeleteWoot for moving forward! Sometimes, reassessing life is just what we need. I'm glad you've got a joyful outlook ahead of you!
ReplyDeleteI kinda knew for awhile I had to make some changes. I kept putting it off because they are/were going to be really tough.
DeleteBut here's to a joyful outlook!
Sounds like you are making the right choice. If you aren't happy then it's only logical to rethink what you want and how to make it happen.
ReplyDeleteLogic is not always my strong suit. Probably part of the reason it took me so long. :)
DeleteSounds like a great plan! Sometimes, you have to work on life goals to clear out the cobwebs for writing goals. :)
ReplyDeleteThose writing goals were definitely getting stuck in some of those life issues.
DeleteI love the idea of putting down the backpack. I wish you all the luck with it!!
ReplyDeleteThanks! I'm going to need all the luck I can get.
DeleteGood for you! I'm proud of you. I'm still stupidly lugging my backpack around.
ReplyDeleteThank you! But don't you be too hard on yourself. Look how long it took me to do it!
DeleteYay! Putting down that backpack is hard to do, but good for you! You can do it! One of my favorite quotes is "the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step." Looks like you're taking that all important single step!
ReplyDeleteThank you! And that single step - and all the ones after - will hopefully be easier. And lighter. :)
DeleteIt's at least worth walking around without a back-pack for a bit to see what you need to take with you for the long-term. Anger usually shouldn't go with you too far. :-)
ReplyDeleteExcellent point! :)
DeleteChange is good. It's the only thing that really exists. Have fun unpacking that back pack and laugh about all those things you no longer need.
ReplyDeleteI'm not usually so great with change but sometimes it's absolutely necessary that we do it.
DeleteI used to carry around a big backpack....and then I discovered the rolling backpack!
ReplyDeleteHa! :)
DeleteWhat a great analogy! And good for you for realizing you don't need these tools from the past anymore. Onward and upward!
ReplyDeleteIt wasn't easy, believe me. I'd gotten so used to them that I couldn't see they were hurting more than helping.
DeleteI'll be joining you on your quest! A break to get re-energized, healthier, and working on the WIP. It's time for ME!
ReplyDeleteGo for it! We can do it! :)
DeleteGood for you! Do what you need to do and go where you need to go. Screw the backpack!
ReplyDeleteI'm wiggling my shoulders and breathing deep. Ready to go!
DeleteGood for you. Hope you find that zest.
ReplyDeleteSusan Says
Me, too. :)
DeleteJust reading about you putting your backpack down makes me feel lighter. Often the biggest burdens we carry are the ones we put on ourselves! Good luck with your weight loss too!
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad you feel a bit lighter, too! And isn't that the truth, about the burdens we put on ourselves? Sheesh!
DeleteCongrats for making those changes. I believe they will make a difference.
ReplyDeleteFingers crossed! :)
DeleteSome great thoughts here!
ReplyDeleteA toast to getting rid of unwanted baggage that hampers creativity.
However, when you're ready to move along again, I would suggest a custom-designed backpack...it's one-of-a-kind, not cumbersome at all, and specially tailored to meet your specific needs. You'll recognise it when you see it.
Writer In Transit
I love that idea, Michelle! Because I will still need some of those things, just maybe in smaller doses, maybe making room for different things I'll need....
DeleteI've put down my backpack a few times in my life. It was hard because I felt I had failed, but in retrospect, it was exactly what I needed so I could climb a tree and see where I was and where I needed to be.
ReplyDeleteIt was really hard for me, Maria, so thank you for letting me know it wasn't just me struggling, feeling like I failed. I can't wait to climb a tree or two! :)
DeleteBest of luck with rearranging the contents of your backpack--or of the pack itself. Change can be scary, but keep moving forward.
ReplyDeleteThank you!
DeleteWonderful metaphor, and I think it's something I need to do too. Take one step at a time. You can do it!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Christine. Slowly but surely. :)
DeleteCongrats on your change in attitude. Hang in there. Love the analogy, btw.
ReplyDeleteI can't take credit for the analogy - it was my husband's. :)
DeleteHang in there, Madeline, Over the years I've discovered the desire/focus/motivation to write runs in cycles just like the weather and most other aspects of life. The love of writing always comes back, but sometimes we need to take a rest and not force it.
ReplyDeleteI do think I'm in some sort of weird life/writing/creative cycle right now. I think this rest/break will be just what need....
DeleteWishing you lots of forward momentum!
ReplyDeleteThank you!
DeleteAt first I thought this meant you were quitting writing. So glad that's not the case!
ReplyDeleteI hope you're able to shed the things that weigh you down, my friend.
Nah! I don't think I could even if I tried. :)
Delete