Welcome to The Blogging A-Z Challenge April 2012! Some of the most popular posts here at The Shellshank Redemption are the Motivational Mondays. So, after consulting the tortoises, we decided to make April our Motivational Month! Please join us for this (almost!) daily dose of alphabetical inspiration. We hope you enjoy it!
* IF YOU NEED ENCOURAGEMENT, PRAISE, PATS ON THE BACK FROM EVERYBODY, THEN YOU MAKE EVERYBODY YOUR JUDGE. (Fritz Perls) *
I used to want people to like me, to like what I wrote, what I did or said or thought. I would still like that (of course!) but I don’t need it the way I once did.
If we’re not careful, it becomes all about them. We start - maybe on purpose, maybe subconsciously - to tailor what we’re doing or writing or saying for their approval. Who doesn’t like a good pat on the back or an affirming nod? We all do. The danger is when that approval becomes the goal instead of the creating, the writing, the art, the journey.
This is such a good point. I used to feel that everyone had to like me and my whole life seemed to revolve around being a "people pleaser." Of course, I still want people to like me as everyone wants friends and kindred spirits, but I realize that can't be the sole motivation. If it is, you just end up losing yourself. Great point!
ReplyDeleteJulie - I think you're right about the "losing yourself" part. After awhile, it's like you don't know what YOU think or feel or want anymore.
ReplyDeletewell said and a good point to ponder
ReplyDeleteLx
I have to admit that I do like a pat on the back. I'm lucky though. My husband is great about encouraging no matter what, but also providing useful feedback.
ReplyDeleteLaura - thanks!
ReplyDeleteCarol - I've got one of those great husbands, too. He's supportive and encouraging but he's also not shy about telling me when something doesn't work in the writing. :)
Excellent post. I used to need approval, too. Even with my writing. Like you, I do enjoy it. But I don't need it anymore.
ReplyDeleteLovely reminder for today.
Amen! So true!
ReplyDeleteSusan - thank you! And good for us. :)
ReplyDeleteLeigh - isn't it?! :)
i dont need the praise, i need an industry someone to tell me my writing is worth my time. how do i know?
ReplyDeleteOh! I remembered to come back today!
ReplyDeleteAnd such a good reminder--I think we do have to guard against getting sucked in by praise, maybe going down a path better left to someone else. I think one of your commenters mentioned it-- the danger of losing oneself.
Excellent point!
ReplyDeleteTara - I'm not an industry insider but from what I've seen of your blog, I would say it's worth your time. :)
ReplyDeleteCathy - yeh! Welcome back! :)
Empty Nester - thanks!