WHENEVER YOU FIND YOURSELF ON THE SIDE
OF THE MAJORITY, IT IS TIME TO
PAUSE AND REFLECT.
(Mark Twain)
I used to think it was "wrong" to think and to feel differently than a lot of the people I knew, to want different things, to want a different way of being in this world. I used to think there was something wrong with me. Why didn't I feel the way she did? Why didn't I think the same thing he did?
I spent a lot of time feeling like the kid on the outside of the circle. You know the one I mean. The other kids are all gathered together talking and laughing and playing but there's always that one kid on the outs. Maybe it's because she loves to read. Maybe it's because he enjoys something the others think is geeky. Who knows? It can be anything and it can be nothing.
Even now, I sometimes feel like I'm on the outside of the circle. I don't always understand what a lot of other people are talking about or why they find certain things interesting. My life is not "normal" compared to other women my age.
It often hurt when I was a kid and, honestly, it sometimes hurts now, too. But I've learned that I'd still rather be on the outside of the circle and be able to breathe and to see all around me than to be stuck in the center where the air can be stagnant and the view is often monotonous.
Anyone want to join me outside the circle today?
I live by this one, Madeline. Nice way to start a Monday, by validating my eccentricities. :)
ReplyDeleteI like that, Shelley - "validating my eccentricities." :)
ReplyDeleteI can relate. But I'll share only a superficial example: apparently, I didn't listen to much "pop" music in the 80's or 90's. When my friends launch into a tune they're all familiar with from the old days, I just smile awkwardly. The only time I'm able to participate: when they sing something by U2.
ReplyDeleteYou are a kindred spirit, Madeline. I've always felt outside of the circle. I found it hard to make friends when I was younger because I just didn't like the same things they did. As I've got older I have learnt to fit in more and make lasting friendships, but I've also learnt that it is okay to be different. Despite my parents relentless attempts to fit me into their version of a successful and contented life, at nearly 39 years of age I know who I am finally. I'm not them or anyone else - I'm me.
ReplyDeleteRevel in your uniqueness and repeat after me, "It's okay to be different."
You have a new follower!
Ellie Garratt
Milo, I've got that "awkward smile" thing down, believe me.
ReplyDelete(But you know, Milo, I would think that being able to relate to this stuff makes you a great teacher in terms of really connecting with your students, esp the ones "outside the circle.")
Oh, Ellie, you made my day! I hope that when I get to 39 (which is REALLY not that far away) I'm as comfortable in my own skin as you are in yours.
ReplyDeleteAnd thanks so much for following The Shellshank Redemption! We're so glad to have you here.
Hahaha! Love that Twain quote. I saw an excellent special about him, and really, he was WAY out of the circle himself.
ReplyDeleteI wonder if that's why we write? If we were in the circle, we'd have no need to express all the stuff churning around inside. And P.S. I'll stand with you anytime, Madeline. :-)
Good point, Cathy! And thanks for standing with me - at this rate, there will be more of us outside than in! :)
ReplyDeleteMadeline, I'd be happy to stand with you too. At some point your uniqueness will be what sets you apart from the herd and will catch a publisher's attention. So don't ever apologize for it. Writers are a unique bunch!
ReplyDeleteThank you, Stacy! And I like what you said about not ever apologizing for it. :)
ReplyDelete